404

“Life is intentional, not accidental. I bless this central fact. Consciousness instigates shifts in outer reality. Recognizing that I have the power to change my world by changing my thinking, I set for myself a gentle vigilance toward negative thoughts.”

I can change my entire world by changing my thoughts. I create my own reality. If I think negatively about what is going on around me, then it becomes more negative. I can make myself sicker. I can give myself a panic attack. All with my thoughts. I can also make myself peaceful and relaxed. I need to pay attention to what I think and practice changing my thoughts. Learn to let go.

What is ego attachment? Ego attachment is when I am attached to the way I define myself. I am attached to my view of myself. It is when I believe the things I tell myself about myself, and when I believe those things to be absolute and unchangeable. Letting go of ego attachment involves seeing the big picture of who I am and that everything about myself can be changed. I can change myself. God can change me. I am simply a wave on the ocean of life And this human life is just one aspect of my divine purpose. I am That.

403

Who has narrated my life? Whose story am I listening to? If my story differs from their story, why is my memory less credible? 

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which a person covertly or overtly sows seeds of doubt in a targeted individual, making them question their own memory, perception, or judgment. 

Tara Westover: “To admit uncertainty is to admit to weakness, to powerlessness, and to believe in yourself despite both. It is a frailty, but in this frailty there is a strength: the conviction to live in your own mind, and not in someone else’s.”

“My life was narrated for me by others. Their voices were forceful, emphatic, absolute. It had never occurred to me that my voice might be as strong as theirs.”

“You can love someone and still choose to say goodbye to them. You can miss a person every day, and still be glad that they are no longer in your life.”

401

From here you support me and I give you strength, from here you hold me up and I never let you down, from here I can feel your heartbeat against mine. 

From here you can see your world and I can know mine, from here you are my rock and I am your sky. From here we will grow our roots into the once barren soil of our fertile souls.

——————-

Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom, have everything you love taken from you. It is the only way to wake up – to be. How do you survive a loss you thought you could never survive? What if you lose yourself, how do you keep going? How can I be expected to rise every morning and to be alive and to be fully present when my heart is lying in the ground.

400

Life is like walking a tight rope. 

It is a balancing act. 

Every decision is a chance to fall. 

To plummet. 

To fail…

 Or to succeed. 

To keep your balance... 

every step, every choice, is easier knowing that: 

“If you you fall I will catch you”

390

 “Rumi. Grief can be the garden of compassion if you keep your heart open through everything, your pain can become your greatest ally in your life‘s search for love and wisdom.”

A higher power, cosmic energy, runs through all humans and life forms. A thread that keeps us woven together when we grieve or suffer. That golden thread glows brighter so that we can see it through the darkness. Finding this golden thread is our life’s purpose. Exploring it. Learning. Growing. And staying connected to it. The golden thread that flows through all life Is the golden trail that we must all follow. It is easier seen in the darkness, harder to see in the light.

389

“Through cancer and grief and disappointment and unexpected turns in career - through the very breakdown and rearrangement of the things I have loved - I have come to realize that, as water smoothes stone and enters sand, we become each other.”

Hardships, pain, suffering is what connects us. It makes us the same. We all know what grief feels like. We all know the suffocating feeling after the loss of a loved one. Suffering helps us sympathize with others and be compassionate. Our pain deepens our love for others and ourselves. Grief cracks us open, to life - to love - and to each other. It is what keeps us connected.

WE BECOME EACH OTHER

388

“Make Voyages! Attempt them... there is nothing else.” ~Tennessee Williams~

Unique. Billions of planets, stars, solar systems, suns, moons. Only one has been found that supports life. And I am here. In the form of the most highly conscious, intelligent, and creative of all life forms. I have been given the gift of this one small but precious life. What will I do with it? Or better yet, What won’t I do with it. Appreciation. Gratitude. Acceptance. Self realization. And humility. Remembering that as a human, with all of the human gifts, I  lose the immediacy of the beautiful precious current moment. Let go of the past. And stop worrying about the future.