a margarita and a little sammy hagar

your funeral, or should i say "Celebration of Life", wasn't exactly done the way you would have planned it or wanted it. e's wasn't either. but i've learned something.... it wasn't for you; anymore than e's was for him. it was for the people that loved you. so they made it what they needed to... so that they could say good-bye to you.
i don't know what i need to say good-bye to you but that wasn't it. i do know that seeing your boys and grand-kids was a start. watching the closeness and the love of the beautiful family that you created. and that you welcomed me into.
i'll find my way to say good-bye... just like i found it with e. so be patient with me k-mommy.... just like you always were. but if you see me struggling too much.... show me the way. just like you always did.